All change please

Updated: Nov 6, 2019

So I have had a full on week, things are changing in our house. She is crawling and Ive baby proofed the hell out of the place. She is teething and I got bit, I have joined the nip nip club so am researching breast feeding alternatives. She is stirring in the night, so it has been gently suggested she go in to her own room. She is getting independent and fell out of her pushchair bumping her head so I now know she doesn't bounce !

It's all happening , and I am sure that something like this is going on in your house too, you're plodding along and just about getting the hang of it and poof, they move the goal posts. I know we want our kids to develop and grow up but it happens so quick at times it can make your head spin and you feel like you are starting over again.

As I said I have batten down the hatches and nailed / moved everything out of reach, that or put a bubble wrap suit on her ( was suggested after she fell out of pushchair trust me )! I am looking at if I stop breast feeding all together what dietary requirements to fill void does she need? Extra bottle / fluids. I am reluctantly putting her in own room this weekend as a trail run. And I have been strapping her in with in an inch of her life from now on. And writing a letter of apology to all my past employers that they weren't neurotic just being safe than sorry. As I have now turned in to one.

For those interested in the breast feeding segment of my rant , she has been dropping feeds so that part was easy, I was just worried when she stops taking from me completely what she needs to keep up fluids. Cows milk for under ones is not recommended as a source of liquids as a drink. But I am giving her a bottle of formula at nights, so the professionals say to just give her formula in a sippy cup instead during the day instead of a feed. She only really takes the big morning feed and I think scratch that know its really for me and comfort. So when she and I get up , Im going to start making a bottle instead. Sad times for me , natural progression for her. I have from my nanny days brought with me the sip cup that is a cup not a teated kind and so she can hold her own and drink it from a non spill cup already. I cant recommend them enough! But if she still wants to feed from me, and ill take it while its there as I love it. I am back on the nipple shields. I had to use them early on as she transitioned from a bottle to me as my milk was late in. So I will dust them off and pop them back on , not looking forward to milk in my waist band again and probably just wean her completely. She definitely knows she has nipped me, heck she full on bit me the other day and then looked so sorry. If this happens to you its recommended to remove them from breast, ( their first time out ) say no sternly , angry look on face ( not hard as nipple is throbbing ) then put them back on gently. If they are old enough for teeth , they will understand your signals in facial expression and tone. Trust me she then ( another feed ) nipped me, she knew full well what she was doing and got the same telling off as such. So far hasn't happened again.

I think , scratch that again know that the same goes for having her own room, if it was up to me she would be with me forever, and having her in with us is for me not her at this point. But she is stirring in the night and it might be because we are waking her. But I figured she stirring so I'm right there to help settle her again and not have to trudge, yes the mothers trudge between rooms in the half light of night. But if I am waking her inadvertently , then she's in her own room , no waking. I will let you know how this goes. Apart from bed / cot her nursery is ready ( has been since about 6 months in to pregnancy , I was bored and excited ) I have a rocking chair ( Ikea) for those nights, a day bed for the really bad ones or sick bubs and or for her to go in to when she's bigger. Pictures on the wall for her to look at. Change table and drawers , etc. A pot plant for fresh air and a salt lamp to help with the feeling of the room.

Because of my career , I did know this was all coming , and I do know how to deal with it. The only thing that I did not know nor count on was how I was going to feel !! I have witnessed so many children grow up, become independent of babyhood, need their own space and bump them selves that they nearly named a wing after them in A&E. It really is a part of growing up , but no one warned me that I would have to grow up with them and let go of 'childish' things too. So I say to all the mothers who just want to hold on to that last sec of what ever it may be, its ok, your can be neurotic ( you are but it's ok ) pedantic , tearful and emotional. You can mourn the passing of one stage to another and get excited all over again when the new phase starts. You can feel like you are not sure what you are doing then get it again and both of you are off. Just as your baby looks for cues from you , and you suggest them back in reassurance. You can look to your baby to what they need and want next and go from there. When we say we are in this together it is not just parents , but children too , whole family units. Just know you are not in this alone !

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