Updated: Nov 5, 2019
Or the bitching hour , ( if only it was an hour )! As I call it, is a term coined by mummies for that 'time' in the evening that bubs just fusses , for no reason at all , like they are trying to keep us on our toes. Because what helped yesterday , doesn't today and what does today won't tomorrow. It's that time after the golden hour ( that time that they are happy full and talking to you , gurgling away happily, kicking on their mats or couch being generally gorgeous and you think oh I got this parenting thing , they are so lovely). Then it all turns. They cry , wriggle , want to be put down or picked up. They are either too hot, too cold , nappy is slightly wet and annoying, neck line is soggy and they want it off. They have an air bubble trapped, ( different from trapped wind or sore tummies ) The light is off, the tv is too loud, the light is on, they want a cuddle, dummy, they don't want a cuddle or a dummy! I am literally just running through the things my daughter has complained about over the past few weeks and she is 2 months old ! But never fear, there is good news and bad. The good is , it's completely normal, I am sure there is a scientific term or a professional one, I was a nanny for 25 years , don't know what it is! But it is very common and nothing to worry about. New mums do get a bit apprehensive, as the words colic, reflux, somethings wrong get flung around, usually unhelpfully by in laws and male partners who are none the wiser. Trust yourself , if something was wrong , you would feel it. And thats the bad news, there is no cure as such to the fussing, it's a phase ( you will learn this term well as everything in babies lives are a phase ) and like the rest of it, they and you just have to get through it. As I said what worked one day might not the next and then suddenly you're out of the phase and on to the next thing , there is always a next thing !!
But don't despair , there are tricks that you can use. Routine is one of them. It can be loose but babies look to you to help them to know what and when and where they are doing things. I listen to them and see when they want to do things and then reinforce their choices . I want to sleep now, rubbing eyes, yawning, so I pop her in to bed, I need to eat now, etc , etc. In the another blog I talk about the verbal and non verbal communications they give, and for you to learn. Anyway you get the job of inserting other things between their cues. So have a bath routine, or sit on couch and watch a certain tv programme , etc. The witching hour becomes less and less as they start to 'expect' things to happen. They look forward to bath time. To the sound of Eastenders or time on their mat/tummy time/dinner time with family in bouncer , etc. Children are like rivers you can't stop their flow you can on divert them and in this case distract them !
How this blog came about is , I belong to a wonderful group of ladies who all had ( or having ) babies the same time as me, we are a source of comfort, knowledge, humour and support to each other as some of us venture in to this thing called motherhood for the first time and others have paved the way with being 2 and 3rd timers. Right from our first antenatal class where we met we have gelled and its wonderful. So this is a little shout out to the Daisy Babies Mummies. But what Im writing about today is a topic that came up just recently. It was a question asked over the group and some knew the answer and some didn't . It made me think that I have this group for reassurance and knowledge , to teach and to learn but some might not. And so I thought I would answer the question that was asked there so that others who maybe have no one to ask can be reassured to by the answer. The grumbling and fussing is standard normal operating procedure. Nothing to worry about and it will end.